Wednesday, August 1, 2007

Never Ever Put Jesus in the Drawer

As time is getting close for Baby's birthday, I find myself ruminating on how exactly this happened. Don't get me wrong, I understand the mechanics (and thoroughly enjoy them) of how it happened. Still, how exactly did this demanding little being come into our lives???

This time two years ago, I was happily settling into a new life. After a long time of single parenthood, I had finally found a man worthy of sharing my life. This was a second....what to call it....relationship for both of us. We both had married young and divorced after relatively lengthy marriages. We were settling into cohabitation with my two kiddies and all was well in life. As I had two children and he had two children, we logically decided that adding another child was impractical. After all, we weren't getting any younger and we were still young enough to appreciate that we were seeing a light at the end of the tunnel. Who wouldn't enjoy the fact that you could leave the house without: A. paying a babysitter, B. packing up your entire world belongings into a diaper bag just to be safe, and C. having kids whine that they wanted to go with you? We had done our jobs - our kids were almost raised and no longer needed us quite so much.

Then my sister went and jinxed us. She bought us the dreaded Jesus candle since we were "living in sin". This particular candle has a lovely image of Jesus pointing to his heart and weeping. My sister's clever idea of a joke. After laughing (and looking at Jesus weeping a little uncomfortably - I didn't want to burn his virgin eyes with our bedroom antics), I decided weeping Jesus would be so much more comfortable sitting in the drawer of my nightstand where he could be shielded from all the sinning - and let me tell you, there was a LOT of sinning going on!

Lo and behold, about 3 weeks after putting Jesus in the drawer, I started feeling "funny". I lived in denial for about another 3 weeks. Then I had to tell my hubby - who wasn't my hubby at the time, hence the sinning - that I thought we'd better get a test. He, in all his obliviousness, said a test for what. Yeah, thats how sure we both were that we were done having children. After all, my husband had testicular cancer years ago and only has one sperm bank and it has a low balance at that. Just to be doubly sure, I was also on the pill. So, now you can understand why I still don't understand how this happened.

In the end, it all worked out for the best. My hubby got his little girl he so desperately wanted. She is the love of all of our lives and being so much older this time around, we truly appreciate it more (except for that lack of sleep shit - that is why people hire Nanny's!). It is a little daunting starting over. I'm 35 and hubby is 38 and between us our kids are 16, 15, 12, 8, and almost 1. However, if one more fucking person asks if we are enjoying time with our granddaughter, I believe that would considered grounds for justifiable homicide.

The best part, my sister is now living in sin and I returned the Weeping Jesus to her. I'm waiting on her announcement any day now.....

1 comment:

Ashley said...

You really are starting all over again! God help you

....well probably not since you have Jesus in a drawer and all...