My office Christmas party was Friday afternoon and everyone was in a fantabulous mood after the juicy Christmas bonuses. We had a blast and since Hubby was out of town, I took Shaggy with me. I think by 9 AM at my office he was starting to regret the decision to spend the day with Momma after he got to hear some of these gems:
After eating CrapDonald's last night I have a lubed anus.
Holy crap, I think I just pooped an anaconda.
Then, while bowling, there was this little pearl:
Me: Boy, you better behave before I have to beat you.
Shaggy: You can't hurt me. I'm bigger than you.
Me: Yeah, well you came out of my vagina.
Shaggy: Speechless Disgust
Then, there is this classic exchange between me and one of the guys I work with:
Me: J whatcha doin'?
Both: collapse into heaps of juvenile giggles
As we were driving home, Shaggy said to me, "Boy, I knew you guys were bad at work but I had no idea." To which, I gave him a knowing look and replied, "You still have no idea - that was us behaving."
If that child ever leaves me alone with his children (please, Lord, wait about 20 years), it will be a minor miracle and I can imagine that prior to coming to Grandma's house he will warn them not to listen to a thing I say.
As a side note, I contributed a small chunk of my Christmas bonus contributing to Ashley's preschool fund in an attempt to bring the groove back. Stay tuned for updates!!!