Monday, December 3, 2007

Mai Tai's, Sake Bombs, and Beer - Oh My

Due to the nasty ice storm we were expecting here in the midwest this Saturday, the trip to Kansas City was cancelled. In lieu of KC, we decided have our dignified girl get together here in town.

You see, my sister is one of those horribly accomplished people you just hate. It appears that everything she touches turns to gold. She has a bachelor's degree and two master's. I'm lucky I have my high school diploma. She is a true intellectual who writes well and teaches college English. To date, I still have not told her I have a blog because (A) I know that my writing is no where near her level and (B) there are just some things sister's shouldn't know about each other! So, I was expecting a quiet night with the girls. I figured it would consist of dinner with some nice wine that I couldn't pronounce nor afford and some dignified conversation. To be honest, I was dreading it. I kept picturing the episode of Friends where Joey bought the "V" encyclopedia so he could converse with the group.

Except - it wasn't. It wasn't dignified. It wasn't filled with wine. It wasn't intellectual. It was a true gutter girls party and I LOVED it.

We met at a Sushi place which was great except I don't eat fish but whatever. I got there before anyone and settled at the bar for some harmless flirting conversation with the very cute bartender. I was nursing my Mai Tai (the drink special of the night) figuring I'd switch to Coke or water at dinner since I had to drive. All of a sudden, this loud, noisy, obnoxious group of girls walked in. You guessed it - my party! They were all a bit toasty after spending the whole afternoon at the bar. I do believe the first words my sister whispered to me were, "I'm wasted". Ahhhh, people on my level.

After much discussion, it was determined that I was joining this party and leaving my car (read: Hubby's car) at the restaurant and I was their captive for the night. We settled at the table were rounds of Sake Bombs were passed (like a Boilermaker except with beer and Sake). Every time I turned around, there was a new Mai Tai in front of me. Although, I have sneaking suspicions that my beloved sister was drinking them. Many a toast were made and a few tears were shed (mostly mine). Did you know that they don't have silverware at these places? You are expected to eat with chopsticks. Yeah, so not happening, especially when one fell on the floor. Like the Mai Tai's, I think my sister ate most of my nicely cooked beef (no fish for me, thankyouverymuch, raw or otherwise).

We left the restaurant much poorer, way drunker, and a lot rowdier than we entered. Then it was time to go back to the bar. We all piled into one car. There was the driver and the bride up front and four of us (yes, FOUR) and one blow up doll in the back. How we didn't get pulled over going down the interstate I'll never know. We spent a lot of time in the back of that car molesting the poor blow up doll and making cracks about her anatonomy.

Finally we arrived at our destination. A lovely little bar called Chicks. Did I mention it was a gay bar? No? An oversight, I swear. I don't know whether to be relieved or insulted that NOT ONE lesbian hit on me. Not one. I must exude that "straight" vibe.

So, the night was a huge success and my sister's friends were all great. One offered to be my girlfriend for the night and I gotta say she was pretty freaking hot. They were all very concerned about whether or not I was having a good time and made sure my glass stayed full. Now, we are all ready for the wedding and I couldn't be happier for my baby sister. She's an amazing person who has been there for me through the good times and the really dark days. She deserves every happiness in the world and her fiance is a great guy. However, I did warn him that if he hurts her I will have to make a eunuch out of him.


Tina said...

I'm not a fan of sushi either. Dh can eat enough sushi to sink a battleship though.

I've never had a lesbian hit on me either. Now gay men, I attract like flies. I'm totally like a "Grace" to them I swear.

And #8 was originally meant as just your specific addendum. But if you want to take it as a poke, so be it!


Sasha said...

Oh, I hate fish too. Really, anything that swims. But I do like shrimp...

Anyway, so glad you had a great night. I love Mai Tais! Yay for fun!